Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
Watching the Walking Dead, snuggled up naked, and drinking a beer. No better way.
If ever there was a tweet to describe your life, it's this.
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
Randomize
