are you still at the devil's house?
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
Randomize
