what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
Randomize
