dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
