I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Randomize
