I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
Randomize
