At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
Life is so much better after having sex.
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
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