So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
Houston, we have a blender
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
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