I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
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