Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
I decided I'm going to give him a celebratory fuck for his accomplishments. Knocked on his door, handed him some condoms and said "I'll be over tonight with sex and booze"
I want to be you.
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Randomize
