I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
My liver just had a heart attack.
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Randomize