SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
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