Your tits are I can't wait for
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
Randomize
