Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
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