This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
Randomize
