Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
Randomize
