i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
And now, by the power vested in me by the state of intoxication, I now pronounce you fucking awesome.
Randomize
