Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize
