so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
My dad just said "fuck circus"
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize
