she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
mike has just informed me of all the things he would put in his pussy if he was a woman. this includes door stops, power drills & g.i. joes.
"and then my dad would be all like 'hey mike, where's the remote?'"
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
Randomize
