dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
Randomize