The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
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