That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
Randomize
