Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
Randomize
