I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
Randomize
