so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home.
you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato.
IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
Randomize
