so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
Guess who just set half their backyard on fire.
Please tell me youre joking.
Nope. on the brightside though, im really gonna quit smoking this time.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
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