Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly.
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
no you cant smoke seaweed
Dude, we're at Einstein's Bagels and the dude next to us is spreading cannabutter on his bagel.
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
Randomize