I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
I just had a horrible epiphany. I have fucked girls younger than Star Tours
This text was so worth waking up to
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
Randomize
