But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
lets start a swedish sibling band together
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
Randomize