He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
Randomize
