i'm signing you up for texting rehab
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
Randomize
