The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it.
And before you ask they are unrelated purchases.
Note to Self: No matter how horny, turned on or in the moment you are, never go down on your gf after she had soccer practice.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
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