we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
Randomize