Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
I just found a 1/2 inch of mimosa in my shoe.
You should get more absorbent shoes.
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
Randomize
