im gay
i know
yea but for you.
The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
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