I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
So I'm dropping a fat deuce at work, and the lock on the stall door slips and the door slides open, when suddenly someone comes in. Now I have two options, I can either get up quickly and try to shut the door quickly (not easy to do with one hand) or I can just sit there and play it off like it's no big deal and I always dump at work with the door open. I chose option two, and it was as awkward as it sounds.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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