That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
These freshman guys were trying to holler at me from their window, and I realized about 20 minutes too late that the best possible reaction at that time would've been screaming "FLACCID PENIS". Oh, and I found this awesome zombie charm bracelet you would love.
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
Randomize
