I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
Randomize
