I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
Congratulations! We have a period
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
Randomize
