ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
Randomize
