No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
Randomize
