Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
Randomize
