No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
