Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
Randomize
