We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
Randomize