I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
Randomize
