Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
Randomize
