my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
I guess she found the pillow case full of vomit I hid last night: "Oh my God. Oh my God. In my fucking FRIDGE?! Really? Hope your dick falls off there's puke all over my food. Fucking die."
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize
