Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
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