Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
